Knowing Love

Wondering if you are in a loving relationship, or if you are really in love? Many people are simply unsure. Why? Because love is something we experience, it is a felt sensation stemming from another’s behavior and actions, and we learn it, or not, in our family of origins.

Know the BEHAVIORS, THE ACTIONS of real love and you will be able to identify whether you are truly in love with a person, or if your relationship is truly a loving one.

Essential Loving Behaviors

  1. To depend and count on one another

  2. To be there for one another

  3. To have each other’s back

  4. To stay together as a unified front

  5. To comfort, support, nurture and take care of each other

  6. To offer safety, a safe place with each other

  7. To have access and know that he/she is there

  8. To be on each other’s mind, to be thinking of you, to be thinking of them

  9. To touch, to hold, to embrace naturally and with ease

  10. To reach, to connect, to move towards one another, to be close

  11. To confide, to open up, to share

  12. To listen, to receive, to take in the other

  13. To make love respectfully

  14. To enjoy one another’s company and have fun together

  15. To WANT to be with you, or with them

  16. To be experience you as a priority, to make them a priority

Adapted from the literature on attachment theory.

Sharon Knipmeyer